Fashiona

Fashiona and her family are only a few hours away from the university and it is Sunday. Her family stops at Morrison’s(many are closed now) for lunch and see a well-heeled multi-generational group of women from Grandmother to Daughter. Grandpa (looking daper himself) is carrying the grand baby, who is playing with his hat.

Fashiona looks over each lady so she won’t miss a thing. The Grandma is wearing a pillbox hat and decked out in head to toe in white. The mom is out of a 1940’s movie set wearing a wide-brim hat with a net and a two tone double breasted suit (think Film Noir ) Fashiona’s Dad takes a double take and gets playful elbow jab from Fashiona’s Mom. The daughter is about 10 years older than Fashiona is hatless but wearing a green wrap dress with gold sandals. Lovely picture to remember!!!

After lunch, Dad gases up for the last leg. (Remember when gas was well under $2.00, okay so that was 15 years ago.) He pulls up the stop sign at the railroad tracks.

Lo and behold, this GROWN man is passing by on a child’s bicycle with (are you sitting down?)

• Pink Fuzzy slippers with white socks.
• Pink rollers(yes the ones that your grandma still uses)
• And ladies and gentlemen… a freakin’ shower cap

Fashiona clutches her heart in horror, even Dad could usually care less about fashion is appalled. Fashiona wishes that she could start a fashion police squad. His ticket would read:

1. Go home immediately and get some proper shoes
2. Get to the nearest barber shop and get a haircut (Beg for a free one if you have too)
3. Throw anything thing pink in your house
4. Don’t ever try to dress yourself without supervision AGAIN!!!!!

Day 2 of driving to college begins with a hearty Southern breakfast: grits, eggs and biscuits with gravy. (Man, I am hungry). Fashiona and her family are well into the Carolinas now. Mom has family in the area so they stop by for lunch.

This Auntie is a 70+ widow, thin as a rail(most of Fashiona’s Aunts could put both JLO and Beyonce to shame) and full of spunk. After lunch, Auntie goes upstairs to prepare for an outing with her gentleman friend. Fashiona is helping Mom clean up the kitchen. Dad is catching a quick nap.

Auntie comes downstairs transformed in a platinum wig , flowly red dress, dainty shoes and matching pocketbook. Fashiona is amazed at this lovely ensemble but unfortunately not rendered speechless. She blurts out “Why, Auntie, you look like you are going on date?” Auntie throws back her head and laughs. “Honey, I am old, but not dead!!!”

Fashiona blushes, apologizes gives her Auntie a hug.

Lesson learned: There is no age limit on fashion(0r dating.)

Dad decides to spread out Fashiona’s trip to college over three days, 4 including packing day. Fashiona ensures that all her old and new favorite clothes and accessories make the journey. She also throws in some notebooks, pens, pencils and word processor. She is going to school after all. No backpack though, she has a reputation to create. Her aunt gives her a soft leather brief case with a shoulder strap. Fashiona is very excited because it is very sophisticated and practical and can go from Daisy Dukes to her business attire.

So Day 2, (Day 1 of actually driving) begins at 8am. Dad takes the first shift past Richmond and the worst traffic. They stop for a coffee break and Mom takes over.

Fashiona is aware that technically the DC metro area is below the Mason Dixon line , the “real South” culturally begins somewhere around the Raleigh/Durham area. The people get friendlier, the lipstick gets brighter and the fried chicken is really fried in artery clogging lard (best part of the trip for Dad).

Fashiona, ALWAYS, watching the people parade, watches the clothing colors get louder and bolder.

Finally the summer comes to a close and it is time for Fashiona to make the 14-hour drive to her college in Florida. Dad rents a minivan for the occasion and warns Fashiona that what can be packed safely can go, so she must prioritize. Sis declines to make the trip with them and stays behind with her cousins in Maryland. Fashiona makes full use of the “extra space”.

Most rising freshman only need 1 trunk and a handful of suitcases. Well, Fashiona is a special case (maybe short bus special… the jury is still out), she needs 2 trunks and three suitcases. She is in a rigorous business program, so the 1st trunk is filled with business suits required for the program.

She did look at the guidelines and decided that the colors were entirely too drab so she added in some playful scarves and even threw in a pant suit. She is convinced that she can bring the school to the necessity of pant suits and sling backs . One can’t live by pumps alone(especially at 17)